Unfulfilled
by reen212000
Summary: I got him. I think. Maybe. No, no, I did... A tag for Irresponsible. Second chapter added!
1. Chapter 1

It was a shoot out, Old West style. I totally expected a tumbleweed to drift between us. The townsfolk had dutifully settled to a hushed silence, watching intently for the inevitable moment.

The sun is still bright, but it's beginning to drop. My mind keeps wandering as I glance at the clear, teal sky. I think it's teal. Kinda greenish blue –

Shoot out. Kolya. _Right._

The massive headache I had acquired earlier due to being in close proximity of an explosion. Stupid Lucius. I would have killed him if he weren't so pathetic. I see him standing there, along with my team, and the only person I regret not killing the first time: Acastus Kolya. I've outdrawn a lot of people in my time. But he doesn't know that, and it almost seems unfair.

A path has been cleared, giving us a wide berth for a duel on this fine day. My team looks worried. If Rodney chews on that lip any harder, he's gonna bite right through it. When I see the look in his eyes, a twinge of pain makes itself known. I try to relax; my muscles are getting stiffer by the second from running around all day, clobbering people, and oh yeah, a bomb.

Directing my attention back to my arch nemesis, I wait. Wait for the flinch. Something to indicate Kolya wants to do this. He must know, if he goes through with this, he will not win.

Personally, I would rather beat the crap out of him with my bare hands. I'd rather break a finger ramming my fist into his face than spend another day wondering when he'll show up again. Pummel his body with blow after blow for the Wraith that fed–

My fingers flex at my side.

_Let's do this._

In a split second, it's over. Did I shoot him? Did he shoot me? Wait. He's goin' down... I'm still standing. This is good, right? Why is Teyla looking at me like that? Am I hit? No, no. I'm good.

The gun is still smoking in my hand; I didn't even realize I drew my sidearm or pulled the trigger. I attempt to re-holster the weapon, but my hands are shaking badly. After several tries, it's finally done.

Slowly, I walk over to the prone body. _Here lies Acastus Kolya..._ Is he dead?

Now I'm standing in the 'gate room. _How did I get here?_ My head is still ringing, and I need to sit down. Looking over to Teyla, I ask the question. "Are you sure he's dead?"

She gives me one of those sympathetic smiles. Teyla Emmagen barely tolerates us earthlings and our weird behavior. One day, she's gonna walk out of my life and offer me one of those smiles as a parting gift. "Colonel, I assure you he is dead."

Something doesn't feel right. I should have checked for myself.

Elizabeth came slowly down the stairs, glancing at each of us. Suddenly, I'm aware of my grimy, smelly clothes. "Welcome back, Colonel Sheppard." Her brow twitched as she assessed me and my team with a critical eye. "Ran into some trouble did you?"

"Hmm. What gave it away?" Rodney's acerbic tone was ramping up. "Was it the stench from our clothes, or the generally snippy disposition, or that maybe we're overdue? I wonder–"

"McKay. Enough." I needed him to stop talking. Besides the massive headache, more aches and pains are making themselves known. "We'll brief you soon, Doctor Weir."

"Aye," Carson agreed. "Everyone to the infirmary." Under his breath, I hear him say Lucius. Honestly, I was hoping to save that for later. And that Elizabeth would hear it from me.

"Lucius?" She was instantly on alert. "Colonel? Maybe we'll talk now. Your team will go to the infirmary for their post-mission checks."

"Umm, hello?" _Not now Rodney._ "We're not the ones who dealt with that sadistic excuse for a human being–" _Not now Rodney!_ "–Kolya–"

"Kolya?" Elizabeth now crossed her arms, eyeing each and every one of us. "Conference room. Now." I watched her turn stiffly away.

McKay fell into step next to me as I slowly climbed the stair. I tried to give him a look that could melt paint. It actually worked; he decided Ronon was safer to be around. Sitting down gently in the nearest chair, I undid my tac vest with a little protest from my arms. And my hands are _still_ shaking...

We debriefed in the large conference room, telling Elizabeth about the situation that unfolded on the planet. Then I had to talk about my impromptu duel with Kolya. Thankfully, Rodney filled in the gaps; my memory failed me as to what happened at the end. "The O.K. Corral? McKay, it was not like that."

He scrunches up his face; this is about to turn juvenile. "Oh whatever, Wyatt Earp. I've never seen anyone draw a gun that quick. You've probably been practicing in front of a mirror..." Before I can retort, McKay regains his composure. "Look. The point is, Kolya is gone. Dead."

"And hopefully, the wishes of Kolya will not be continued." Teyla looks directly at me.

"Which are?" I had to ask.

"That someone else is searching for you to kill you." Her raised brow could give Elizabeth's a run for her money.

"Well, besides the Wraith."

_Thank you, Rodney._ Like I'll ever forget that. My mind casts backward to my last encounter with a Wraith. My hands start shaking worse, and I pull it away from Carson's eagle eye. I cross my arms, trying to escape the feeling of loss and regret. Suddenly, everything comes crashing down on me. I've got to get out of here. Get outside, breathe, find a moment's peace. Better yet, run to my room and bury my head under my pillow for a week.

"Colonel?"

Crap. Zoned out again.

"Is this post traumatic whatever?" McKay is snapping his fingers at me. "What's wrong with you? You didn't get hit, did you? Are you hiding something?" The words tumbled out of his mouth in a rush. While he sounded peevish, I saw the concern in his eyes.

I hug myself tighter, trying to still the tremors racking my body. "There's nothing wrong with me, McKay," my voice sounds strangely calm.

He leans over to me. "Are you sure? Because you look like yer gonna pass out right now. And your eyes did that thing when you zone out–"

"Knock it off, McKay!" I have to get out of here. My heart stutters, and I feel panic settling in. Everyone is looking at me, and the room is getting smaller. I close my eyes and take a breath. Faintly, I hear Carson suggest that we get some food and rest after our check-ups. I have a feeling he wants to get closer to me, but he's on the other side of the room.

"All right. I'm looking forward to your reports later. Colonel Sheppard, I'd like to talk to you for a moment."

_What?_ Can't she see I'm falling apart in front of her eyes? Yes, I'm good at hiding things, but I'm not that good. Even Carson has abandoned me. Rodney, however, lingers for a second, watching me. When he finally leaves, the room is empty except me and Elizabeth. I look around me. The shining table, the gleaming walls, the setting sun. Anywhere but her face.

I hear her shuffle towards me. "Are you all right?" Her voice is soft and compassionate. "Rodney's kind of right, you know."

"I'll be fine. Maybe," I rub my cold fingers across the back of my neck, trying to soothe my sore muscles.

"I know you have some thoughts on the finality of Kolya." Her eyes stray to my shaking hand resting on the table. I move it to my lap. "And I'll leave you to them."

With a great sigh, I close my eyes. After a bit, I open them, looking just over her left shoulder. "I feel like it didn't happen. That he's not dead, and this is all a dream."

She nods sympathetically. "It was probably over so fast, you didn't have time to register the event."

"Yes," I say, but there was something more. My tired mind refuses to let it come to light. The claustrophobic feeling is creeping back on me, and I stand too quickly.

Her brows march to the top of her head, surprised by my sudden movement. She reaches out to catch me as I sway. "Going somewhere?"

"I gotta go. You know, get checked out, take a very long shower." I wiggle out of her grip.

Now she smiles. "I cannot tell you how much I've wanted to wipe that smudge off your cheek." She seems to be assessing me again, but right now, I don't care. "See you at dinner?" Elizabeth looks hopeful, and I _know_ I look doubtful.

"Umm, yeah, sure." I turn to leave, and the room keeps turning. Small, cool hands wrap around my arm. "Sorry." Her hand moves under my elbow, and I try to pull away. I know. I have issues.

She holds firm, and guides me out of the room. "Let's get you to Carson."

We walk down the busy main corridor, and I tell her of Lucius and how I found the bomb. Retelling the story reminded my brain that I'd hit my head on the table. Great. A brand new headache on top of the other one.

By the time we got to the infirmary, I'm faltering. I needed sleep like, right now. From far away, I heard someone calling my name. Carson looked so worried; Elizabeth too. Maybe _I_ should be worried, but all I can think is, _when did they get such soft pillows..._

---------------

The End. I think.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: This has been on LJ for a while. I forgot to post it here.

Somebunny really – I mean really – wanted a second part to this little tag. So, at long last here it is...

Part 2

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"Reach for the sky, Kolya!" Sheriff Sheppard drawls.

"Sorry, Sheriff. This town ain't big enough for the two of us!" The bandit Kolya glares mightily from under his black Stetson.

"This could end bloody or... not as bloody. Your choice."

Kolya seems to consider this as he lights his giant cigar. "Well," he says slowly, tossing the match into the crowd. "Since I'm the bad guy –" His hands flew to his holstered gun.

But it was too late.

The sheriff spun his smoking gun back into its holster, watching the bandit sink to the ground. Hooking a thumb through his belt loop, Sheppard walked over to the motionless body. He needed to check his handiwork, but Kolya's henchmen were already carrying the body away. "Hey, where're ya goin'?"

As he came closer, the crowd gathered around him. A woman broke from the crowd. Dark eyes and caramel skin, she was all smiles.

"Howdy, Miss Teyla," the sheriff greeted, tipping his hat back.

"Oh Sheriff! You have killed the bandit! Now," her dark eyes full of hatred and loathing. "What of the Wraith?"

"Wraith?"

Just then, a very angry, heavily tattooed creature came bursting through the crowd. It held out a hand, touching Sheppard's chest.

---------------------------

I woke with a start, expecting to see a non-human, sepia-colored Wraith standing over me. Extricating myself from the twisted sheets, I take several deep breaths. Running a hand over my face, I wipe away the sweat dripping off my brow.

"What were you dreaming about?" a voice says from behind.

I had been lying on my side, with my back to the rest of the infirmary. My already stiff muscles grew tighter as I nearly jump off the bed. "Elizabeth! If you know what's good for you, do not sneak up on a person!" I think that's what I said; a series of squeaks and croaks is what reached my ears.

The lights had dimmed when I woke; nice to have an entire city obey your thoughts. In the very dim light, I can see a frown has appeared between her brows, and sadness in her dark eyes. Coaxing the light up a notch, I want to ask what's wrong, but a tickle has formed in the back of my throat. When my bout of coughing subsides, I felt cool plastic against my lips. The water nearly evaporates on my tongue, but the tickle is gone. Rasping my thanks, I hope that Carson won't appear any time soon.

"Are you all right?"

"I'm fine. What time is it?"

She smiles slightly. "Late. Want me to get Carson?"

"No, no." Why am I here again? Oh yeah. Fell asleep. The soft pillows are not at all what they were earlier. Now that I'm awake, they're rough and flat. "I'm good." Which is actually true. My headache is nearly gone, or at least medicated to a dull roar. Taking a deep breath, I remember why I woke. Untangling my feet from the light bedsheet, I discovered I'd been redressed in scrubs. Teal scrubs, to be exact. The same color as the sky when –

"Where are you going?" A spark of amusement colors her voice, and I snap back to the here and now.

"Um, I have to... um," I say lamely, feeling like I'm asking for a hall pass.

She positions herself in front of me, taking my hand. "Well, come on."

"Elizabeth, I'm pretty sure I can handle this all by my–" I'm interrupted by a well-placed punch in my arm.

Now she's grinning at me. "Do you mind? I am trying to work on my bedside manner here. Also," she sobers slightly. "I came here to apologize."

"For what?" The events of the day flash through my mind.

She sighs, and all her words come out in a rush. "I didn't realize that you were suffering."

Suddenly, I feel my brows rise. "It's okay. Really." Suffering? I know I was out of it – okay, way out of it – but I don't think I showed much on the surface. In retrospect, yes, I felt like I was falling to pieces, but... Suffering?

"No, it's not okay. I noticed your hands shaking, but my need to know our city was safe kind of overrode everything." Stopping just in front of the restroom door, Elizabeth looks at me closely. "Rodney told me he had some trouble keeping you focused on the way back to the 'gate."

"Oh he did, did he?" Not that I remember. Too busy freaking out over killing someone who tried to kill me too many times.

Elizabeth's cool hands wrapped around my arm. "He gave me quite the earful. It seems our resident astrophysicist had been observing you closely."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. And I have to tell you," she squeezed my arm. "A concerned Rodney is a scary Rodney." We chuckled together, but she still looked uneasy. "I just want you to understand the safety of The City and everyone here is –"

"It's important to me too, Elizabeth." I wasn't upset with her; I knew she meant well. If any of my men came back through that gate with the tale we told, I'd want answers too. "We've been doing this for nearly three years. I'm fine; everything's fine. Kolya is dead, and Lucius has been neutralized." I took a deep breath. "Just need some time to wrap my head around it all." I jerked my thumb in the direction of the beckoning door. "Speaking of which..."

Elizabeth actually blushed. "Sorry, sorry. I'll see you for breakfast?"

"Absolutely," I say, knowing things can change within the meager hours before dawn. I close the door as she leaves. When I open the door again she's gone, and the infirmary is still quiet. Gathering my smelly clothes, I slip out of the bad place. Feeling the reassuring hum of The City under my bare feet, I smile. We'll all be fine for now.

And her bedside manner is improving. Really.

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The End. Really.

A/N2: So that was the second part of that story. It's cheesy, which is kinda why I left it off. I only changed it a little. Originally, Sheppard woke up to Rodney clacking away on his laptop. But thanks to an interesting point by Stealth Dragon on LJ, I needed Liz to explain herself, and while John may have been breaking down, it's possible no one else would have seen it on the surface.

There you have it, there it is!


End file.
